James, earn this, earn it!

This is the last words of Captain Miller (Tom Hanks) in "Saving Private Ryan". I know Lord is saying the same thing to me when he died in pain on the cross two thousand years ago.

The whole rescue does not make sense to the soldiers on the mission, as said by Private Reiben: "You want to explain the math of this to me? I mean, where's the sense in risking the lives of the eight of us to save one guy?"

Pvt. Reiben: Even if you think the misson's FUBAR, Captain? (Fubar means Nonesense, I think)

Capt. Miller: Especially if you think the mission's FUBAR.

The mission did not stop when they found Ryan. Now Ryan did not think he should be saved. He did not asked to be saved, nor did he want to. Ryan: "It doesn't make sense, sir. I mean, why me? Why not any of us?"

The mission made no sense mathematically, it made no sense practically. No one can answer Ryan's question. What Ryan did not understand is that it was not about him anymore, it is about all that they were fighting or dying for: the humanity that was lost in Europe under Adolf Hitler. If no one was willing to die for this mission, the Americans were no different from the Hitlers and it made no sense to even fight the war.

Lord died for us not because it made sense under any human reasoning. He died because it is the only way to lead us from darkness to light. We are lost and need to be found, we are blind and need to regain the eye sight, we are imprisoned by our sins and need to be set free, we are oppressed by fears and need to be released.

What else can He do? He did not have to die, or must he? Every day I need to ask myself: did I earn the new life I received from Him? I hope at the end of this journey, I can say the same words as Older Ryan in the cemetery: "... And I've tried to live my life the best I could. I hope that was enough. I hope that at least in your eyes, I've earned what all of you have done for me."